Thursday, January 27, 2011


So the agency called me back. They said we could come into the program at any time. They said they had 3 birth moms right now that would be ready to look at folks with one mom due in Feb. Us and one more family would be the only ones shown because no one else was ok with african american moms. Yea, but I did lose a little faith in humanity. Really people? Its none of my business, but I am surprised that more people are not more open, but then again I am not surprised.

Then the bomb hit. The prices have gone up. Really up. I always just assumed I would be a stay at home mom. I still want to, but I also would like a kid before I am 80. They have a payment plan, but we can't make the payments if I quit. We make good money, but evidently not really enough to get a baby.

The price is high enough that we are going to look at other agencies. Back to the drawing board, I guess. I will re-call the Lutherans. They don't do sit down info. meetings, but will talk to you on the phone. I am going to request a sit down and see what they have to say. I just don't trust conversations over the phone. I can't see your body language and what you really mean. Some of Sam's friends were doing foster care through an agency in Austin I may check with them, too.

There have got to be cheaper places out there. Really, I am just kinda of sad. I just feel like once we get close to something a hurdle is thrown in our way. It happened with China, Ethiopia and now this. I just don't think it's fair, we are not rich folks and we just want a baby. That is all. Just one soft little baby. I know there must be a master plan and everything happens for a reason, but mostly I am just disillusioned and frustrated. I think I need to go take a bath and just go to bed early.


Sara said...


Sian said...

I can understand why this is a post you are proud to have written. It's very moving.

Anonymous said...

This post is sad but well written. I feel for you in the fact that couples who would be wonderful parents can't be to children who desperately need parents just because of greed. Very sad.

Becky said...

This is a very honest and moving post and I think you were very brave to post it. I hope things are now looking brighter for you.

Jen said...

A very moving post - and I see why you are proud of it. I do hope things have improved for you now? ((Hugs)) J x